#5: On Aging Gracefully
Are any of us doing it and what does it really mean, anyway?
Last month, I had posted the trailer for the then upcoming premiere of The Golden Bachelor on my Instagram Stories, along with some words about my excitement for the show. I got this DM, and responded instinctually with the reply below.
Now that I’ve had some time to sit with my thoughts about aging and appearances, I feel a bit differently than my off the cuff reply.
The word, “grace,” is defined as, simple elegance or refinement of movement, and the word, “gracefully,” is defined as, in a respectful and dignified way. We have historically used the term, “aging gracefully,” to refer to the way that some people have embraced their physical appearance changing with age, rather than fighting it; welcoming the wrinkles, sags, greys, spots, and more, with dignity and elegance.
I admit, when I was younger, I did moralize it. I felt that the people who "gave in" to anything, from lighter procedures like filler and botox, to more invasive things like face lifts and surgery, did so largely because they were insecure, and could not make peace with what cellular degeneration did to their outer appearance.
Then I matured, became more aware of the capitalistic society we exist in, the respective gender norms around aging appearance, and what society has engrained in us, through both subliminal and overt messaging, when it comes to aging and beauty.
The Beauty & Personal Care market is worth $625.70 BILLION, as of this year.
When you go to Sephora’s Skincare category, you have the option to shop by concern. 2 out of 7 of those concerns are, Anti-Aging and Fine Lines & Wrinkles. You click on those categories, and the product pages are littered with words like Firm/Firming, Lift, Line, Renewal, Youth, Anti-Aging, Wrinkle Repair. These are just some of the marketing hooks integrated into these product names. Repair is the one that makes me a little grumpy, like, are our faces broken because they have some wrinkles?
For most women, these product names and marketing are nothing new. Fear around aging and potential decreasing desirability (both in romance and the workforce) as a result, have long been capitalized on to sell jars of 1oz creams that cost the same as two weeks worth of groceries.
What IS new to me though, is finding out that today’s (pre) teens are already enrolling themselves in this anti-aging marathon. An excerpt from this stunning article:
Earlier this year, Bradley posted a TikTok of her daily skin-care routine to her 36,000 followers. In the 70-second-long video, we see her take two apple cider vinegar pills, apply retinol, do a ten-minute face mask, and drink green tea with raw honey before getting in a car with a piece of paper taped to the window to block out the UV rays. “Here are some things I do to slow down the aging process as a 14-year-old,” Bradley narrates. “I started doing most of these things at 12.”
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